25. You enjoy watching people argue 

No. I hate seeing people argue, at least if it’s a real argument. For example, even watching couples fight on tv makes me think to myself- come on, try and see each other’s side. 

I don’t mind watching debates over issues where I can hear differing sides of a topic, but I really don’t like arguments. I suppose that says something about me with regards to avoiding conflict. I will in fact, do what I can to avoid conflict. The bible says that as much as it is in your power, live at peace with all men. I honestly try. That said, sometimes I have been called to be the one that intervenes in a volatile situation. In those situations, I prepare myself for the worst, but then try and actually enter into the talk as if they are reasonable people and will be adults. I have found for the most part that treating them in a straightforward and honest way gets a good result. 

I’ll give an anecdote related to this. I was waiting for a flight one time that was clearly going to be late. I was sitting at the gate, there was no plane outside, and we were supposed to be boarding in 5 minutes. Clearly, we are not going to be boarding on time. 20 minutes after the boarding time, we get an announcement that the plane is delayed but we should still be able to make it on time. I can see this is a lie, and I’m kind of pissed. But sitting across from me, also waiting to get on the plane, were a few employees of the airline. One guy explained what was up, and with the truth, I could accept it and wait. 

I don’t know why the airline would choose to lie to our faces when it was obvious the flight was not going to happen on time. We would certainly figure it out eventually, so why lie? This of course isn’t really the point, the point is that being straightforward with uncomfortable truths works for me, and I assume it will for others too. Treat them like reasonable adults and they’ll usually respond in kind.  

I do think that an entire generation has grown up watching reality tv, which is filled with good-looking, but horribly behaved, people. They see the fireworks on tv and think that this is the way to handle conflict. Metaphorically kick the saloon door open and start blasting.  

And I think, even prior to reality tv, too many people go into conflict with winner-take-all attitude. They come in expecting a fight and the first words out of their mouths are fighting words. 

I have several times defused these situations just by being calm. (A soft answer turns away wrath, is the way Proverbs 15:1 words it) I’ve been in accidents where as soon as people get out of the car, they want to start throwing accusations around. I’ve gotten out and said- sorry about this, I don’t know what happened. And immediately, as soon as they figure out there isn’t a fight, they calm down.  

Years ago I read an article, I think it was in GQ, that talked about how to win arguments. And the author was clear he wasn’t talking about debates- making reasoned arguments, using logic etc…. he was talking about how to win a nasty argument. It came down to convincing the other people around you that you are right and the dude you’re arguing against is wrong. He brought up all kinds of below-the-belt ways of making the other person look bad, so you’d make yourself look good. THAT’s the kind of argument I don’t want to have anything to do with. 

If that’s the type of argument the statement is referring to, then I don’t like seeing arguments at all. 

26. You tend to avoid drawing attention to yourself 

Welllllllll, not exactly. But of course it depends on the situation too. I was on the worship team at church for 18 years and I was perfectly comfortable being up in front of everyone. I never minded being up in front of the congregation to teach either.  

 In social situations, I am a heavy participant in the conversations. I almost always have something to say and will contribute.  

This of course changes if I’m ill-prepared for something that I’m supposed to be doing. I don’t think anyone wants to get up and make a fool of themselves by looking like they shouldn’t be there. But in general I don’t shy away from attention.  

I can’t say I’m a ‘life of the party’ type of person, I’m not. I don’t have that kind of natural charisma that makes me able to walk into a room and command it. But I am comfortable having attention too. 

27. Your mood can change very quickly 

My mood doesn’t change drastically for little things. I’m not someone who flares up and is what some people refer to as a ‘quick burn’. I’ll use my father-in-law as an example. He used to have a pretty hot temper, and for pretty minor things too. If a kid didn’t close the door right, He’d yell at them. But then it would be over. I’ve seen him react almost violently to small things, but then it’s over. He’s mellowed with age…. and probably more because all the kids grew up. He has a very logical brain, and I think he doesn’t get ‘kids’ at all- in other words, he can’t understand how they can do such illogical things. Yeah, he was a kid once too, but it was a long time ago. Maybe he didn’t like himself as a kid either, dunno. 

I don’t have any of that. I think I’m pretty even-keeled. 

In fact, there are a lot of times I might be pissed about something. Then I find out that I was wrong or misunderstood. My mood won’t immediately switch to bright and happy. I’m stuck with holdover stinky mood for just a bit. Not too long, but it will take 5-10 minutes.